Have some patience for the part of me that's lost

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"Mr. Forgettable" by David Kushner

A song that has stayed close to me since it was released last year in 2022. 

The opening lyrics:

"I know that you're waiting for me like a dog, but have some patience for the part of me that's lost."

The wonderful thing about music is the meaning behind each song and how it relates to each listener differently. This song was originally written from the perspective of the artist's grandfather with Alzheimer's. Tonight was the first time learning about this tribute and a part of me felt selfish for thinking it could be about anything more than the incredible meaning it already has. 

Then I reminded myself that music is supposed to allow us to think deeper behind the lyrics and make it more personal. A song is written by their artist with an intent, but how the intent shifts to make a connection between an artist and the listener is what brings the magic to music. 

Therefore, I made this song personal. 

Just yesterday, I went to my mom and told her how lost I was feeling in life. It hasn't even been 2 months since I finished up with school and began my gap year, but all my mind is left to do is wonder where I'm at. I feel lost in direction, purpose, and inspiration because just 5 months ago, I had a direction, a purpose, and inspiration leading me to my future. 

I now keep myself on a constant mode of "go." I don't know how to say no, force myself to rest, or just be still. I'm so lost that I'm filling my time with people, activities, or driving to my next destination because at least that way I don't feel like a lost puppy on the side of the road. 

The craziest thing about it all is that I'm not sad. I would like to think there is a very big difference between being lost and being sad. If I were sad, I wouldn't be having a good time with my friends. I wouldn't be bonding with coworkers as I start to work more and genuinely enjoy going to work. I wouldn't come home and spend as much time as I can with my parents for the little time I am home. I'm not sad and I'm proud of myself for realizing my feelings aren't sadness. 

I'm just lost. 

So, jumping back to David Kushner's words in regards of how to handle a lost soul, just be patient with them. That person is doing what they can to make it through what feels like they're stuck in limbo. Don't look at them like they're a dog, waiting for a reaction or sparks to fly in their head. Instead, look at them as a human being. Do what you can for them while they figure this out. Once they find direction again, they will remember who was patient with them in the part of them that was lost. 


With love, 

Jenna K. 

Location: Pike County, IL, USA

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